1. Curried cauliflower pie for dinner (tastes much better than it sounds).
2. Watching 'Castaway' in bed.
3. Sleeping in until 7:30 AM.
Honest self-appraisals, regardless of repurcussions.
The media has recently rallied around a 7 yr old adopted boy who was returned to his native Russia because of severe behavioral problems that they were previously unaware of. Discussing the responsibilities of parenthood with co-workers led me to articulate for the first time how important self-appraisals can be.
The popular opinion is that when you opt to parent (as adoptive parents do even more consciously than accidental, biological ones), you should be prepared for all the attendant challenges. Even the unexpected ones. My thought is that entry into parenthood should start with an honest self-appraisal of capabilities. Not everyone has the mental or physical resources to undertake challenges and pretending otherwise is by far more unfair to the child. These adoptive parents did not opt to parent a disturbed child: that they recognized their limits is a good thing in my book. That they reneged so completely on their promise for a better future for the child is however, a crime. In these times of media power, I find it hard to believe that there was no possibility of finding to find alternate custody for this child and spare him the trauma of rejection and the return to the dismal conditions he'd just left. I fault the parents in this piece of news for returning their child to Russia where prospects are limited....they should have looked harder for other options to deliver the better life they promised the child. But I do not fault them for balking at the prospect of parenting a difficult child.
I do not agree that the overriding problem with adoption or even with our collective societal outlook is that we’re too quick to quit. It's that we choose to live in denial and blunder about doing damage to everyone in the process. Isn’t it more important to actually do the right thing than just appear to be doing the right thing?